Confessions of a “gay thug”
- Thursday, January 13th, 2011 at 12:07 PM
Dear Bella: Let’s get it out there! I am GAY! And no, I don’t mean bisexual but fully gay. However, no one can tell as I don’t act feminine and don’t be seen with gay people.
I hang with the thug crowd and do all the other manly thuggish things but I am just gay. It took me a while to accept that this is who I am and even though I am still not confortable with being this way, there is nothing that I can do.
The reason that I am writing to you is because I have been having a sexual relationship with another thuggish dude and both of us hang out in the same group. None of the other guys in the group knows about us and that is the way we want to keep it. My problem is this – whenever we are hanging out in the group and someone who is obviously gay passes by and the other members of the group starts to make fun of the gay person, he joins in right along with them and sometimes his voice is the loudest.
Not only that, some of these people he is helping to insult are some of the very same people who we have had threesomes with. When I confront him about it he says that he only does it to keep up appearances and that he sometimes calls the person he has insulted to apologise. I just find that to be quite hypocritical and it hurts me to know that someone who is gay but on the down low (DL) can find it so easy to insult some who is openly gay.
Sometimes I just want to expose the both of us so that he can see how it feels to be ridiculed and insulted the way he insults other gay people. I am just frustrated and don’t feel like having anything to do with him anymore but he is the only DL gay person that I know. What do you suggest that I do?
***Don’t Judge Me***
Dear Don’t Judge Me: Well, you need to talk to him again about it and tell him if he keeps it up then the friendship may be in jeopardy. That’s the most I can advise you on. However, I do not think it is smart to expose both of you. It could do more harm than good.
Hope this helps.
Bella
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71 Comments
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just nasty…how the hell can a man pass up something such as a woman??!! i love the girls to death….i got friends who are dudes but i rather be around the females….much love to the women and respect to the REAL dudes who think like me…loving them chicas forever.
OMG!!! WHERE IN THE BIBLE DOES IT SAY THAT SIN IS NOT A SIN TO GOD?!?!?!?! THE BIBLE IS PERFECTLY CLEAR ON GOD’S STAND ON HOMOSEXUALITY….IT IS JUST AS MUCH OF A SIN AS FORNICATION WHICH ALSO THERE…IT IS WRONG!!!! POINT BLANK!!!! FATHER FORGIVE THEM FOR THEY KNOW NOT WHAT THEY SAY (PRAYERFULLY)
The Bible says that death onto the child that disobeys his parents and if a woman has sex before marriage she should be stoned to death! even adultery is punishable by death! you don’t see that happening right!
Homosexuality was considered a sin but not by God! The Bible says to come as you are and that he created everyone equal! so who are you to commend gays for something they have no control of?
POWER TO ALL THE GAY PEOPLE! AND HOLD YOUR HEADS UP WITH “PRIDE”
I feel you should be able to love who ever you please !!!! Nothing is wrong with being gay !!!! But kno when its all said and done there will be a price to be paid !!!!!! ( I love gay men lol dey sure can dress !!! tehehe)
I dnt c anyting wrng
ge an watch other ppl i sure half of u r gay or been aroun dem or even have dem in ur family>:-(:-/:-|
Wit gays who are u guys to judge he came for advice nt put dwns an am a full blown str8 u ppl ard so qwik to jud
This is a major problem in the BVI, I dont have anything against gay people ,its your life so you should be able to live it. They are a lot of men in the BVI who play both sides, the ones who people are rumouring about being gay are not the ones who are gay. People need to be paying much attention to these thugs roaming the streets. Most of these thugs, you dont see them going out with any girls, they are always with the boys hanging out. They just stand together in a corner and when a girl passes, they spusssssssss after the girl trying to maintain their thug image when really all they want is man. Some time back when I was at UP’s there was this man and he had a girl with him, the guy passed a group of young men and they started making jokes that the man was gay. I know the man they was laughing at and I know that he is not gay for a fact. I found it so funny that the man is out with his girl and they are calling him gay and these so called thugs are always with a bunch of man. I am sure at least two of the young men in the group are gay. Its funny that a gay person would call a straight man gay so that they would feel better about themselves. Ladies I am sorry to tell you but if you have had anal sex with your man there is an 90% chance that he is gay. A fully 100% straight man would not have anal sex with his girl friend.
@go figure, I agree with you on this. Some of these gay thugs be calling other people gay when themselves are gay to throw of the radar off themselves. I have more respect for gay people who come out and say they gay than these thugs who are on the DL.
Wow how sad and nasty! You men professing to be be gay I am praying for your salvation. That you would accept Jesus Christ. In the meantime I hope that logic would tell you that you dont take your reproductive part and put it in another mans hole that spits out waste/stool. this is the most perverted and abominable act a detestable sin..
LET ME JUST SAY!! I RESPECT THIS WRITER!! Dude you got alot of courage to sit there type that out and knowing the amount of negative things you would get!
I understand how you feel, really I do. Not too long ago I been in the same situation with a friend. How I handled it? I let him know, I told him that he doesn’t have anything good to say to the person keep his mouth shut, because he is not only insulting the other person but himself too!! It worked for me and that was the end of that!
Also you shouldn’t give a rat’s behind what others think, they don’t pay your bills nor put food on your table yuh chk? So why should you care to tell them? It’s your secret to keep so it’s when you are ready =)
Right now what I’m doing is counting the few more months to get out of prison (ESHS) then I would live my life better! Being a gay teen in Elmore Stoutt High School?? haahaa, being DL is my only option in there!!
So I hope I helped! and once again, MUCH RESPECT! for this!
P.S its funny reading all the negative feedbacks!
Dueces to all you HATERS!!
~ I’m a masculine guy and I like guys, what they gonna do? nothing!!! REAL THUG! ~
@Another Gay Boy for ayo!,
Thank you for this and I really appreciate it, I don’t worry about what negative comments people say on here, I just read them and pass over them. If they don’t understand the thinmgs we go through then that is them. Perhaps we can talk more…[email protected]
U NEED TO BE HANG,BURNT IN THE HELL. I GOT A FEAR SOLUTION FOR YOU 6 BU****ETS.
waaaaaat bwoy thank god I leff Tola a good while now, everybody down there sound like dem is hardcore battybwoys lol and that shit is hilarious because most of the man dem down tola does be calling man battybwoy for every little ting when they themselves are hardcore antiman. Time fo allyo man dem down there to reflect, renounce, and rebirth cause batty business is unrighteous and being a born again christian ain’t gonna help u either|!!! lolz
@LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL, I guess you are probably god then to know if being a born again christian wouldnt help someone. You must be well un educated about the bible, you are just someone with a small mind and a big mouth.
READ BIBLE A MAN THAT LIE WITH A NEXT MAN SHALL BE PUT TO DEATH, LEVITICUS READ DA SHIT, ALL OFYOU WHO SIDING THIS JUST FULL A SHIT.
hahahahahaha….. This story is soo funny. Cant imagine…. but good luck to ya’ll…. God to play.. Just note that
Your partner is probably living on the down low that is why he doesn’t want others to know about his life style. You have to be true to your self and come out of the closet. Doesn’t it get a little suffocating living in the closet? I do not condone homosexuality, but you are also one of God’s creations. Start living. At the end of the day you are the one who has to face, live with, and love the man in your mirror.
p.s Being a thug is neither sophisticated nor intellectually stimulating.
All gay man going straight the pits them wha got fire burnin 4 de rest of eternity all churches in tortola will reveal that!
I just cant understand for the life of me why this fool callin he self a thug. Stop pretending!!!!!!! Old nastyness, is people like u wah causin so much sickness in the place if u say u like man and only man stop playin ur self and come out from pretending u so hard and let the people know who they really dealing with insted of being fooled by u and buttox buddy them in crime!!! Some people would say seek the man up above for help but i say get (CLOROX BELACH)
@coppertopshatta!!!!!!!!!!!!, lmaooooooooooooooo da shit funny a muss say clorox ya say ?? lmaoooo
it have some woman on this talking and some of them man is botty man to the bones
you all need to go the hotel near to the pub you would see who botty man
married man
man you wouldnt believe in that heck
I am going to say this, you can’t call your friend out like that…both of you are living a LIE so you are NOT better than him with is his “so call bully ways” either…. You so ready to throw him under the bus who throwing you under the bus???? So, be very careful of the feathers you are thinking of ruffling my there son….you might want to consider looking into your friendship with those same so call thuggsss…..ask yourself this question “just how much of a thug are you”…all that stays in the closet will eventually fall out..so when you are ready to release yourself from that heavy burden you choose to carry around….keep this in mind daily….what will your friends reaction be towards you and are they really your friends…..stop playing macho, because that you’re not so walk away from them before the scene becomes an UGLY one….they will or might beat you down (along with other bodily harm) PRETENDING to be a THUG, RUDE BOI is not taken lightly and you know that…….you’re not that hard of a man…..walk soflty, and be careful of the stones your throw…..love and be honest with yourself….then you will ( I pray) be able to be honest with those around you and love you for who you are and your preferences……To God be the Glory…..Pray for guidance…we are ALL his children…..
We have been burying our heads in the sand for a loooong time. Tola has had its share of gay men and lesbian women for years.. i remember some of them as a child growing up and ppl would only whisper and talk behind their backs… but we ALL KNEW the men and women who were like this and they had husband / wife and kids.
Just like the child molestation, the drug dealing and acting like they real business men.. ALL this MESS have been going on in THESE GOD fearing islands for YEARS!!!
The younger generation are just bolder with this stuff now. If this is their sexual orientation, then that is their business and i could care less about it. Good or Bad, Right or Wrong, We ALL have to answer to God for ourselves.
@This been going on in TOLA forever…, I love this part of your statement —->>>>IF THIS IS THEIR SEXUAL ORIENTATION, THEN THAT IS THEIR BUSINESS AND I COULD CARE LESS ABOUT IT. GOOD OR BAD, RIGHT OR WRONG, WE ALL HAVE TO ANSWER TO GOD FOR OURSELVES.
I cant say I am surprised. People often think that if a man is quiet or show a soft side that he is automaticaly gay which is not true. It is the ones who live a thug lifestyle is the ones who are gay. Why you think these boys like jail so much. The people who like to bash Gay people or like to spread rumors on others are the ones who themselves are gay because they are insecure of themselves. So when you see a group of young men trying play hard in their gang just know that couple of them are gay in the group. So to make things easier to know who gay from not gay its simply, a straight dude does not get into trouble and tries his best to keep out of jail, a gay dude likes jail, if you see someone keep getting into trouble so that they can get right back in jail they gay.
@Open your eyes, That’s a hilarious take on the matter. Anyhow, I am a single woman and I’ve had a few men here over the past several years that many would consider to have it all. Money, the clothes, the bling, the cars, the women….and showed tendencies in the bedroom to suggest they would enjoy playing on both side of the fence. Further, from what my girls tell me this is quite common and the consensus is that there is a large majority of men that are closet bisexuals. Go figure.
Remember Sodom and why it was destroy. Be reminder God put Adam and Eve in the garden not adam and steve. your rectum is to pass the wast from your body so you can live.
@God Loyalist, who evere gives this thumbs dwn is a $%^&*#@#% …THIS IS SO TRUUEE
At the end of the da…..
We all need to first judge ourselves before we start calling out others and making a judgment on what they are doing…the same judgment you speak over some else will come back on you. You reap what you sow….and trust and believe the harvest is always larger than the seed sown and many times people can’t take what they dish out. I have nothing to say directly on this matter because it’s not my place…but I did read the article because I found it interesting then I started on the comments and I was just surprised….. God be with you all.
no man shortage im a young man and str8 as an arrow ladys holla at me to much otty man round tha place link up a real dude that chriesh the female strcture and everything else she have to offer want my number write back and ask for it.holla back
he need to distance himself from this guy. one of these days the persons he rediculing will expose both of them! I would if u slept with me and making jokes about me with your crowd… a video is only a phone away!
MR Live your life if you are gay thats your choice
What I hearing u mean more man shortage,women u have to borrow a good man now and then for i know these are young men uall in trouble.
Stop being judgemental! being gay is not a choice some people are just born with extra hormones.its like trying to fight sleep or hunger.
Well at least ain’t nothing boring with some gyul in love with some man who ain’t hers, who ain’t single. Down low brothers ain’t nothing new, it’s not surprising, well i ain’t going lie you’re grown men but i don’t agree with your lifestyle, don’t condone it, but talk to ur boy let him know what’s up, and see how it goes and if it don’t make a difference, then leave him alone.
Bella, I usual like your advise but you wrong on this one. TELL TELL TELL ON BOTH OF YOU
that whole system just need put against a wall and smoking all. jah create male and female for one another, plants, animals ,people, male for female/ female for male.jah will neva forgive what man create.
Let me shed some Christian light on some of these things:
1) God and Jesus are the same (+ the Holy Spirit = Trinity)…
2) God does not hate people…He hates sin…not people…For God so loved the world (that’s people) that He give His one and only Son…
3) God did not destroy Sodom and Gomorrah because of sin…sinning is what sinners do….God expects them to (and knows they will) sin…God destroed Sodom and Gomorrah because He could not find righteous people…read the conversation God had with Lot.
4) all sins (homosexuality, any sex outside of marriage, stealing, murder) are equal – in that they seperate us from the love of God….no one goes to hell becuase they have sinned….they go to hell becuase their sins are not forgiven…all of us going to heaven are only going because our sins have been forgiven by the shedding of Jesus’ blood…
@Truth and Freedom, and the bible also say if a man lie with mankind as he do with womanking it an abomenation he should be put to death.
@to the piont,
Point well taken…additionally heterosexuals were taken outside the city gates and stoned to death for having sex outside of marriage (see Deutoronomy)…
My point is we are all sinners, saved by the grace of God, through the blood of Jesus – no other way…Paul reminded the Christians of his day, the they too were sinners (idolators, fornicators, etc.)…sinners saved by grace…
So, while I am completedly against homosexual behaviour…I am not against people…I am learning to hate a behaviour without hating someone…hate doesn’t bring people to Christ.
@Truth and Freedom, Nicely said Truth and Freedom!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Gay is nasty!!!
The cometh of the Lord draweth Nigh
A Gay Thug! It’s kind of hard to imagine a thug being gay! Most thugs like straight up pum-pum. I feel that you use the thug persona as a cover up, because you don’t want to be ridiculed like your friends riducule other gay guys. You and that guy need to come clean, or you can have your cake and eat it to. Be sure that if you come clean, you better be ready to go into hiding, cause those thugs might want to kill the both of you. I can’t imagine those thugs taking that news lightly.
This is a funny story though I must say!
@What?!, You don’t know what time it is, a lot of thugs are gay.
@What?!, You clearly have not been to the US of A. They are many “GAY” thugs here darling. I believe him. I have a cousin that is gay and he type is the GAY thugs that can pass as straight guys not the feminine looking ones. So there you go. There is a qorld out there…you have NO idea! Trust and Believe.
Here is a suggestion……why dont you and your cohorts each take turns washing your mouths out with BUCK SHOTS! that would be simply awesome.
I expect that in addition to the few comments before mine there will be many many more that will follow calling you a sinner and a disgusting man. They are all wrong and God loves you.
Now more importantly, it would not be right for you to call out your friend and expose him as gay. Chances are it will backfire and your ‘thug’ friends may make you regret your words. Be careful. If you are in the Caribbean where we are inundated with homophobics it is understandable your desire to remain on the downlow but truly you are only doing yourself harm. You are living a lie and witnessing your gay partner voicing his distaste for your lifestyle is painful because you yourself are voicing a distaste for it also. You are hiding in fshame and fear and denying yourself personal happiness. Perhaps it is time to recognize that we are the company we keep and find a new crew of friends. If it means finding the courage to love yourself and withstand the scrutiny, humiliation and degradations that many people will throw at you then you need to find that deep within. Be a thug to yourself. If you hold back and hide who you really are you are not discovering life the way God intended you to be. You will find misery. Please seek counselling or advice from peers and in the mean time seperate yourself from your thug friends, and your DL, if he chooses to continue behaving deplorably towards others who are gay.
@SLICK ROTHSTEIN, God loves all that He has created, but He DOES NOT LOVE HIS LIFESTYLE. Don’t speak for God, until you know EXACTLY what you’re saying because if he repents and ask for forgiveness God WILL FORGIVE HIM, God is not like man, NOTHING LIKE MAN, remember that and NOOOOOO GAY church leaders are not acceptable, but still loved and ready to be forgiven.
You people sound so ridiculous! There are thuggish gays. (God knows I need to find me one!) But seriously though, its 2011, when are we going to respect each other for who they are??? I seriously would like to know what you will do when your child comes to you and says they are attracted to someone of the same sex. Disown them?
@Tommy Boy, My son is twelve and we’ve had the gay talk and he knows if he ever comes to me with that crap he will be disowned and im liable to kill him myself….REAL TALK
@SLICK ROTHSTEIN, you are dump as you are ignorant
@ SLICK ROTHSTEIN,
You wrong no heck you telling people that they dumb and spelling dumb wrong LMAO!!!
@SLICK ROTHSTEIN, Lets hope that your instant HATRED towards your son if he were to tell he’s gay doesnt make him kill his own self…something that is very prominent amongst gay youth, not just like we see in the American Media, but right here in our VI Waters. This hatred that we display to ours children about same-gender loving people, is slowly killing these gay children inside. We need to wake up!
@Tommy Boy, THEN IF HE KILLS HIMSELF IT SAVES ME THE TROUBLE!
@SLICK ROTHSTEIN, lmaooooooooooooooooo u dumb !!!!!!!!!
hmm im a lesbian i no what im doin it not right but i jus cant help my self i jus have a huge thing for woman since i was in 2nd form and ive graduated a while now … im real open with who i am and im glad that my homies dnt judge me for who i am because love have no gender and there happy once im happy and i no niggas would love a 3 some withh 2 ladies BUT gay mans hmm come on that plain out nasty n 3 some ewwwww niggas really love them some … sa
@hmm, Miss if you look good then girl on girl aint no problem…….but if you look like LeBron James or Rosie O’Donell then JESUS CHRIST!
@SLICK ROTHSTEIN,
i dont think it is rite but i got a weakness for pu$$i that i just cant help fortunatly or unfortunaly i dont get it that often , long over due rite now ,
@i feel u,
OMG! you seriously just said that
ppl quick to judge sah….hope you do the right thing
this cant be on TOLA
@john john, You’d be surprise what Tola has come to.
This is full of win.
wa the hell i seeing here/ gay thug wow i wonder who tha could be? 3 sum with man? that totally ewwwwwww god made adam and eve not adam and steve ayo need to come again clean yooo
@YUCK LIKE YAHHHHH, he also said those without sin cast the first stone
@bertrude, that does not make any of you right. lolz
yuckkkkkk
GAY…..uurghhh
A gay thug? So what, do you wear a pink leather jacket? Do you say heyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy after you curse someoen out? Lol. A gay thug. last gay thug I knew ws buried a couple weeks ago.
This Whole Gay Thing Is Just Yuck & He Talking Bout Threesome WtH!!!!
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