I’m in a relationship, yet I can’t let go of my ex
Bella - Tuesday, June 15th, 2010 at 11:33 AM
Dear Bella: I need some advice, because I can’t decide what to do. I am a young woman and I’m in a relationship with a loving guy. The problem is that I haven’t gotten over my ex, who I was with for over four years.
I left my ex because he wasn’t treating me right, however he refused to let me go. He keeps calling me and texting me and telling me he still loves me.
I still love my ex, and the two of us have had sex several times since I’ve been with my new boyfriend. I even tried to leave my boyfriend to go back to him, but after a few weeks I realized that it was a mistake.
Now I’m back with my current boyfriend, but I know he is very frustrated. What should I do to get over my ex?
Dear miss,
You cannot have your cake and eat it too. I think you’re acting very selfish. Stop playing around in your new boyfriend’s head if you cannot be faithful to him. If your heart is with your ex then you must be truthful to your new boyfriend instead of frustrating him. I take it that you left your ex for a reason which you have not told me. But to be each other’s booty call while you’re in a relationship is not the solution. In fact, you will admit that you’re hurting your current boyfriend in the process.
You think that when you have sex with your ex you’re feeling a void because of your love for him. Still you know that if for four years he hasn’t been treating you right it may be difficult for him to suddenly change, and from your impression I don’t think he has changed otherwise you would not still be in doubt whether to go back to him.
Do the right and selfless thing.
Bella.
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7 Comments
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You are a fool. A man will only do to you what you allow him to do. you are allowing your ex to use you, and you are using your current boyfriend to get over your ex. There are names for someone like you. If you burn the candle at both ends sooner or later you will get burn. Until you know what you want, you should leave ALL MEN ALONE.
yup everyone does the same thing dont listen to some woman when they say only man does do it it jus means that they do it!
This is a very riskful situation lady. This situation have been happening a lot in relationships. This poor innocent young man is being treated on and it is not fair to him.Be honest with your present boyfriend rather than hurting him. We have to be very careful when choosing our partners there is so much dishonestly in realationship now, we have to assess an individual very carefully before we get seriously involve in a relationship.
First of all you don’t go back to stale vomit. Now that your ex knows that you have cheated on your current boyfriend with him, he would not take you seriously when both of you all get back together. My mom always told me never go back to someone you left because they would treat you worst than before and that is so true.
Secondly, there is a reason you left him in the first place, therefore, if it was meant to be, you all would have still been together.
Thirdly, I think you have rushed into another relationship to quickly. Take some time to sort out yourself and your feelings then get involve with someone because you would end up hurting innocent people.
You don’t want to crew up this guy for the next person that comes along do you?
Seek God and allow him to show you the direction he wants you to go. Sometimes the craving of the flesh gets us in all sorts of mess. As humans we need to be smart and seek wisdom and understanding and if we do happen to sin, at least do it with one person.
so females do that to … ok hmmmm guys we not alone with these situations then , its a human thing i quess
All I will say to this lady is ” the way you begin a relationship is usually the way it ends”…you cheating on your new guy with ur x then you too need to be x'd out of this new guy life….you may have ran into a new relationship way too soon but that still does not make it ok for you to cheat on the fella……you won't like him cheating on you so why you doing it to him???? girl, karma is REAL and it will soon bite you where and when you lease expect it to occur….too many std's and sti's out there for you to be playing games…want ALL dont get none!! keep cheating, time will soon tell on you….
What you are doing is selfish and cruel! How can you cheat on the heart of your current boyfriend? Have you no respect or care for anyone but yourself? If you don't want to be with your ex boyfriend then learn to be single until you are over him. To carry any feelings of love for your ex and to simultaneously involve yourself with another man is, for lack of a better word, disgusting. What are your doing? What you can't handle being single and having to do things for yourself? You can't handle sleeping alone? You are playing with not one man's feelings, but rather the heart and mind of two men! You know exactly what you are doing even if you are not willing to admit it to yourself. You are using this new boyfriend to amuse you and maybe you would like for him to win over your heart, but he won't be able to as you are in love with your ex, having sex with your ex, and wishing your ex would take you back and be the man you want him to be. You have a collar and leash around both these men's necks and I hope they are smart enough to bite through their leash and run fast away in the other direction.
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