My boyfriend might be seeing another woman and now I am falling for an older guy
- Tuesday, May 3rd, 2011 at 4:40 PM
I am a young lady and I am very confused!!!
I have a boyfriend who I love very much. He have been together for eight years now but the problem is that he is out of state and I think when he is home he is seeing someone else. I confronted the girl I think he is seeing and she said nothing is going on but Bella his phone rings all the time, she calls him everyday and text him too. What would you think if you were in my position?
This have driven me away and I am now seeing a man that is twice my age. I am really beginning to fall deeply in love with this other guy but I seem to be falling for the wrong guys. Bella this new guy was married twice and unfortunately it doesn’t seem like he can get over the pain of being rejected twice.
What should I do about my boyfriend and the suspicions he is raising in my mind and this other guy I am seeing?
Very Confused.
Dear Very Confused,
I see red flags in both cases. You said you and your boyfriend have been together for eight years and yet the relationship doesn’t appear to be as solid as expected after all those years. With this girl calling and texting constantly there is substantial grounds for being suspicious. Have you spoken to him concerning your suspicions? I suggest you do.
Now concerning the other guy who is twice your age, again I see some problems because apparently he hasn’t gotten over the pain of his two previous divorces. He is going to bring a lot of baggage into any new relationship and this could spell disaster. I would not suggest a relationship with someone like that unless he decides to break clean with his past and move on. Plus age could be a factor you have to take into consideration.
Now you are at a cross road and you cannot serve two masters. Probably you should start thinking of moving on from these two guys. You’re young and full of potential and you can always find a guy who will love you for who you are.
Bella
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7 Comments
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young Lady tink about yourself first n foremost. if ur guts instincts tells u dat ur boyfriend of eight years is cheating, well he is. always go wid ur gut instinct. in da long run even if u was wrong its ok, sumting probably wasnt rite about it sumwey along the line to make u tink like dat. as for the married man, leeavee dat alone. consider Bella words of advice seriously wey he is concern. bsides he jus want to kno he got sumwey to put wat he hav n u bn young and vulnerable is his best n easiest choice. tink wisely. do u want to b controlled by him really? caus das jus wats goin to happen. he’s goin to try n get outta u wat he didnt get outta his two marriages. wen he whisper his sweet nuttings n ur now silly ears, your jus goin to be his mattress and hand towel n das it. leeavveee dat, leh he find a ants nest to put wat he got in it. take ur time. wen real love comes around u will kno it. it will feel different. tink school and abt ur future. eeni meeni minnee mo.
You aren’t in love with either of these guys. First off, how can you call your first the “boyfriend” if he is seeing another girl and you are seeing another man; there is nothing suspicious about it. You know you are both through. Secondly, how can you possibly be in love with a twice divorced man who has been rejected twice by other women? There must be something terribly wrong with him. He either has committment problems or he is a loser that couldn’t give of himself in a marriage.
Girl, take heed because this is a word from the wise and probably the best piece of advice you’ll ever receive as far as relationships are concerned. Stop worrying about being in a relationship. Relationships don’t define you! Never think that just because a man shows interest in you you have to fall in love also. Take stock of yourself. Recognize your potential and love yourself. This means learning to live and enjoy life for the things you love to do, not for what a man wants of you. Never settle for a guy just because he is there and smiling at you. (They all smile at first). Honestly, sit down and think about the characteristics that are most important to you when it comes to a man you’d want to spend the rest of your life with. Aim for those characteristics…yes, you’ll have to be lenient because no one is perfect, but I sincerely doubt either of these two men in your life presently, would even make your list. Go out there and live the life you dream of living and I promise you when you are free and happy and doing something one day that really makes you happy. When you inner happiness makes you glow, that is when a man will see you and be interested in the real you. It’s with a man like that that you’ll find love.
@Don’t Settle for Less, i love it
Go and do some study,have some good education…
which will help u in making ur future, rather than whining over relationships…
In both relationships you will have to cry now or later…Its upto u
you seem to be looking for love in all the wrong places, jumping from the frying pan into the fire. Both men in your life are dead beats, and your relationship will end no where. wake up, get up and aspire to want more for yourself.
Well said gwen
@apple second that 2. do somehting with your life instead of worring over those 2 men the aint wort the ground u walk on girl. stand up and be tall go back to school and better your self and you will find someone who will love u for u and u will be happy ok.
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