My boyfriend tells me he loves me only when he is drunk
- Tuesday, June 21st, 2011 at 10:33 AM
I am in love with this guy, who I think is in love with me too. The thing is he only says he loves me after having a few drinks, so I am not sure about his true feelings, or if he is just a coward about the whole affair.
We go everywhere together and everybody knows us as a couple, and we behave accordingly, but he just does not say he loves me.
Is he afraid that I might hurt him, if I am aware of his true feelings, but because he does not tell me exactly how he feels, I am unsure as to my role in his life.
Some days I think I am just wasting my time. I have been in other relationships before, and never have I have had this situation, its almost like me going after him, instead of the other way around.
I would do anything for him, but I am wondering if he will do the same for me.Some days I feel like I am being used, and he is just waiting one day that his ex girlfriend will accept him back, and then he would not have made any commitments to me, so he will feel free to just walk away.I am wasting my time and affection?
Lonely Nights
Dear Lonely Nights,
Love is a two way street and if you are not getting what you are giving, then it’s time to move on because sweetie your nights will indeed continue be lonely.If a man is only willing to admit his feelings when he is intoxicated, then that’s a red flag right there.
I think you should put your boots on the ground and give him some time to “sober up”.You should not do “anything” for a man who won’t do “everything” for you.
If you feel you are being used, then maybe you are. I also get the feeling that you are keeping something else inside.
What’s this about his ex taking him back? I hope it doesn’t mean that he was dumped by her?
Because if that’s the case, your guy is probably on the rebound. It could also be the case where he’s killing time with you in the hopes of getting his ex girlfriend back.Life is too short to be waiting on a man to decide whether he loves you naturally or after a few drinks.
I say kick him to the curb.
Bella
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12 Comments
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I GET 1 LIKE THAT
I say keep him drunk then you start drinking and maybe you will be able to see! Its hard for a sober person sometimes to see what’s behind a drunk one.
Just kidding Sister!
The real is this, If any man is not willing to make one commitment with anything in their life, don’t expect any from him(that goes the same for women). If the man did not say he wanted to stay with you for the rest of his life as one family from the beginning, then it just is not there. Make yourself a queen and bride and then let God send you the right man. P.S. What God chooses for us is not what we think we need, because God looks at the heart first and man looks outwards. Man want and God provides needs!
Be blessed without stress!
A man when drunk ….speaks out his true heart
If you want to hear the truth from someone, get them drunk! It is clear that the man loves you but most men don’t know how to express it. Giving a woman money, gifts or sex is at the bottom of the list but that is what most men do to show their love.
a man who is drunk is a different person than a norman person …if i were u ,i’ll run before its too late!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You said We go everywhere together and everybody knows us as a couple, and we behave accordingly, thats action for me maybe if you really didnt love you he wudnt go everywhere with you. Maybe he used to told his he love her all the time and she brook his heart so he feel he should try to protect his hear for now or maybe your just insecure and not saying everything. Not because he dont say he love you mean he does’nt like someone said a drunken mans words are a sober mans thoughts.
A drunken mans words are a sober mans thoughts. Maybe he jus wahn the sex
Your letter has a few hidden topics making it difficult to answer. My first instinct is that he is just not that into you. It is unfair of you to want the guy to love you and say it if he doesn’t feel that way. he may be just using you as a rebound, and waiting on someone better to come along…women do it all the time, so don’t be surprised. If he is still hung up on his ex then he should be mature enough not to get into a new relationship until he has worked through his feelings. You should have resisted also. You can never know the true feelings of a heart and the type of love someone felt for another. Never believe you are better than the last and that the girl or guy will get over their past love when they get to know you. Best to stay out of any relationship beyond casual friends for at least a year with someone who has been in a loving relationship that has ended abruptly or amicably. Healing time is required and that person needs to learn to love themself again and take stock of what they want or don’t want in a relationship…else risk reliving the same mistakes over and over again.
In this case you may want to be the mature one and walk away for the time being. As the saying goes, if he loves you he’ll come back. In the meantime recognize that just because a person is seen with you, sleeps with you and goes through the motions of being a partner that doesn’t mean anything. People do what they feel makes them happy and sometimes people use members of the opposite sex as comfort and to fill an emptiness they have inside. Then one day when they rediscover thier confidence they find the person they are with really isn’t the type they like. Just be careful. If you do “take a break” or call it quits then I suggest you do your best to stay away from men who are recently out of a long-term dating relationship or marriage.
@One Year Recovery is Best,
I AGREE WITH U 100%. I COULDNT HAVE SAID IT BETTER MYSELF
lol
He loves the sex. He probably doesnt know how to love himself, so how do you expect him to love you or anyone else? Maybe his ex left him for the same reason. I am sure she has found someone who knows how to love her and will not be returning to him any time soon
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