Still in love with my ex
- Tuesday, July 12th, 2011 at 2:17 PM
I broke up with my high school sweetheart of 6-7 years after he got another girl pregnant and left the country right after the break up.
I’m back now after four years and find myself falling for that guy. I do love him very much but just not certain whether I should get back in a relationship with him. He has admitted he has feelings for me and not sure if he’ll ever get over me, but I just dont know if he loves me genuinely.
Its now five years since we broke up and so much has happened: I have a child and he recently got out of a relationship with someone that he cared deeply for. He told me his girlfriend left him for petty reasons but he has changed over the years (no longer cheats).
We have discussed getting back together but we both have alot of questions and doubts. But I do love him very much. We are both single and have always maintained good communication between us.
Is it wise to get back in a relationship after a five-year break up?
Confused
Dear Confused,
So you two were high school sweethearts for 6-7 years but then he got someone else pregnant. This is the first red flag. If he had loved you genuinely from back then, this would have never happened.
Then he got into another relationship but has now broken up because of “petty reasons,” as he said. It would be quite useful to know exactly what those “petty reasons” are.
Tread with caution. Don’t jump into anything with him right now. Keep the good communication between the two of you going. Take into consideration you have a child and children always complicate matters. Just make sure you don’t fall in a trap that you will regret later on.
Bella
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4 Comments
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I think that you should b his friend an just that. You have been there done that,SLEEPING WITH SOME ONE AND THEN BECOMING THEIR FRIEND IS TRULY AMAZING. Do not succumb to anything other than friendship, you have doubts and so does he, stay away from the sexual aspect be honest just tell him, he may be relieved when you do cause if he is kinda still hang up on his ex anything goes. You have a child that you are accountable for, tread carefully.
the answer to your quetion is no. You should not try to rekindle a relationship with your ex. Do you know how to maintain a friendly platonic relationship? Women have to learn to walk and don’t look back.Build a life for you and your child and let the past remain where it belongs in the past.Have you grown since then, or have you remain stagnant?
To be honest you should no longer be making decisions only for yourself; you have a child now to consider. Your child’s well-being come before your personal desires. Take away the feelings of love that you once felt and look at the picture as an outsider. Is it a good time to have a relationship and how will it affect your child? Is your child of the age where he/she requires the majority of your attention and love? How will having a boyfriend affect that time? What kind of man would be best for your child? If the child were to get to know your boyfriend and love him like a father figure, what affect will it have on he/she if that man has committment issues and does not stick around? I could continue, but you get the picture. As Bella suggested, do NOT rush into anything, despite your heart telling you otherwise. This guy cheated on you, had a child with another, and is now out of that relationship too; with a pretty lame excuse at that. Play it real cool for a while. Assess the situation. Don’t bring anyone into your and your child’s life that will only hurt you both.
Just don’t go back just stay friends
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